A Reflection on The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
Welcome back to the second installment of this reflection-based journey through The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Whether you’ve read the book before or are simply here for the life lessons, I’m so glad you’re tuning in.
This series isn’t about reciting Covey’s words like scripture—it’s about translating wisdom into real, lived experience. It’s about bringing character to the front of the conversation in a world obsessed with results.
Let’s begin.
In Order to Have, We Must Be
So much of modern culture encourages us to focus on what we can produce, earn, or prove. But one of the core teachings in The 7 Habits reminds us that we can’t have lasting transformation unless we first learn to be someone who lives in alignment with that vision.
This is what character-first means to me:
- Intentionally showing up with integrity
- Choosing responsiveness over reactivity
- Embracing growth, even when it’s uncomfortable
And for me, this kind of growth isn’t just strategic—it’s spiritual.
I’m not religious, but I am deeply rooted in energy. I believe that every intention we hold, every action we take, carries a frequency. That frequency determines what we attract and how deeply we embody our own evolution.
There’s a reverence to this kind of living. A trust in the process. A surrender to what’s unfolding. Because if we’re trying to manipulate every outcome, what we’re really doing is operating from fear—not faith.
And so I’ll ask:
✨ What promises are you keeping to yourself? What promises are you breaking?
Not in a guilt-trip way—but in a truth-telling way. Because the life we want to live doesn’t arrive when we finally get all the ducks in a row. It arrives when we become someone who honors herself—quietly, daily, and without the need for applause.
The Gravity of Change
Here’s the thing about growth that no one really tells you: it feels like resistance.
Stephen Covey calls it habit gravity. I call it physics.
When you launch a rocket into space, the biggest resistance happens in the first few minutes after liftoff. The gravity is strongest then—not because the rocket is failing, but because it’s changing its position in the universe.
Early in the “knives down season” I’ve spoken about before, I found myself clinging hard to control. I was trying to reclaim a sense of worth, not from alignment—but from achievement. I wanted to still feel legitimate outside of motherhood, outside of being the emotional keystone of our family. But I was reaching for it from a place of not enough—still performing for the world instead of creating a life that felt meaningful to me.
The heaviest gravity I’ve ever felt? Wasn’t in the breakdown itself. It was in the transition. The shift from being the “good girl” who did all the right things for all the right people… to becoming the woman I had always dreamed of being—for me. That’s where the resistance was strongest.
I kept trying to apply the old formula: work harder, try more, do better. That hyper-masculine, prove-your-worth kind of hustle. But every time, I hit a wall. I kept getting humbled by the lack of results—not because I wasn’t working hard enough, but because the method was misaligned. What had once served me no longer fit the woman I was becoming.
Because control is not alignment.
Control is fear in fancy clothes.
When we resist change, it doesn’t mean we’re doing something wrong. It means we’re doing something brave. And that bravery comes with gravitational pull. It comes with friction, self-doubt, and the temptation to slip into old patterns.
But none of that is failure.
That’s just the cost of becoming new.
So today, I want to invite you into this reflection:
✨ Where are you confusing gravity for failure?
Where in your life do you feel like you’re falling short—but maybe, just maybe, you’re actually doing something extraordinary?
A Final Word on Being
Living character-first doesn’t mean perfection.
It means presence.
It means growing into the kind of person your dreams are safe with. The kind of person who keeps promises to herself. The kind of person who trusts the unfolding—even when it’s messy and unglamorous and painfully slow.
And if you’re here, I already know that’s who you’re becoming.
Next Up: The Spark of Desire
In our next episode, we’ll talk about the journey from dependence to true interdependence—and what it means to live with a spark of desire that comes from within.
You’ll walk away understanding how to trust your own timing, how to move from stuck to sparked, and how to honor your capacity at every stage.
And until then…
✨ Keep your promises.
✨ Honor the gravity.
✨ And remember: becoming isn’t linear—it’s sacred.
If this post resonated, share it with a friend or bookmark it to return to later. You don’t have to grow alone—let’s walk this together.
You're doing such a great job,
Lex
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